York County Parents "More in Control"
After Triple P
Fort Mill resident Jean Piermattei has everything it takes to be a great parent. She holds a master's degree in education and a bachelor's degree in family and child development. She was even a school counselor. But, when it came to raising her two children, she knew she needed help.
"Seeking parenting help means that you understand being a parent is the most important thing you can do, so you should do it well," she said.
|
Jean Piermattei and her
husband Steve spend a day with son Sampson and daughter Julia. |
"We started with a checklist for behaviors and I could see that some of the aggression wasn't as frequent as I thought it was," Piermattei said. "I realized it wasn't as bad as I thought it was and it seemed like I could handle it better. It got rid of the absolute kind of thinking that she's always hurtful to her brother because that wasn't the case. It helped me feel more positive and more in control which led to better things."
Another problem she experienced with her children was whining - but she was prepared with a Triple P strategy.
"My son is very guilty of whining and I tell him you don't get what you want when you whine or that I don't understand what language he's speaking," she said. "That usually puts an end to it."
Piermattei found, however, that not all strategies worked with her children.
"Quiet time didn't go over so well," she admitted.
It's this flexibility in strategies that won Piermattei over to Triple P.
"The program acknowledges that children are different," she said. "Triple P lends itself well to differences, instead of being a very regimented, 'do this' and, 'do that,' kind of program."
Triple P offers parents a variety of strategies. Some strategies may work with some children and not work with others. Parents are encouraged to identify troublesome behaviors and use the best strategy for their families under the guidance of a Triple P provider.
Piermattei is pleased with the outcome but says her children still misbehave.
"I have to get my head around the idea that there will be conflict everyday," she laughed. "You can't change all of the behaviors but you can focus on the big one. Otherwise it's too overwhelming."
To keep from becoming overwhelmed, Piermattei said has adopted Triple P's recommendation that parents take time for themselves.
"I like the tip sheet on stress reduction Julie gave me. It has helped me to understand much of good parenting is about how we as parents handle ourselves - not reacting out of anger. I've worked on that," she said.
She recommends Triple P to other parents who may be struggling.
"First of all you help yourself. You need to take breaks because you can only be good to your child if you're taking care of yourself. If you're screaming at your child remember that's the behavior you're modeling for them and that's not the kind of behavior you want to see in your children," she said.
We could be featuring your family next. To find Triple P providers in your area, follow this link.
If you have a story about Triple P you want to share, please contact us.
